I was reading a blog post the other day about grief. This woman at All Our Lemony Things lost her father about three months ago. Apparently some well-meaning friends and family members think she should be at a different point in her grieving process than she is.
Grief is a very personal thing. It takes different paths according to where you are in your own life at the time of death, the place of the relationship with the person before they passed away; if you had unsettled business or if you were able to make peace before the person died, just to name a few things.
I wrote a comment to her post and this is what I said:
I love what you said here. I remember 33 years ago when my 18 year old younger brother suddenly died in a car accident. It took a year for the physical pain I felt to subside. People thought I should be over it way before I was. They didn’t know what I knew, that the loss of someone so close, someone so dear to your heart is a tangible, living, breathing thing. Grief has it’s own path. To follow that path brings healing.
I still miss my brother but I grieved him well, and continue to grieve, even after all these years, when the occasion arises.
Have you ever experience a time when someone thought you should be “over it”?